Captain's Log Day 16

Oh, hello again!

How are we all doing? What are your latest obsessions? How are we channeling our aggressions? It’s hard to sit inside being so sad, angry, and worried!!

And yet. Despite all our rage, we are still just rats in a cage!! Truly, by the end of this, Jack and I will be leaving quarantine as Big and Little Edie. If you haven’t seen it, now might absolutely NOT be the time, or maybe it is the perfect time, but Grey Gardens is everything. And it’s streaming on The Criterion Channel (thanks to a lovely Friend of the Pod for the login).

But really, I hope you all are settling in. Finding peace where you can. I’m a Virgo with a Cancer rising and an Aquarius moon so …. the stars fated me well for this. Being from the Midwest, I am also too used to long hours and days of being stuck inside.

And for your brief enjoyment, here’s a running list of iconic recluses. Please reply with your favorites.

  • Boo Radley (style icon)

  • Linton Heathcliff (we stan a physically and mentally weak character in a story of brooding and yearning!)

  • Howard Hughes (OCD classic)

  • NUNS! At least convents have gardens. Self-sufficient queens.

  • Aforementioned Big and Little Edie

  • FIONA APPLE. She’s been social distancing in Venice Beach for years. Bless her heart.

  • Emily Dickinson (no offense but I don’t really want to read y’alls quarantine poetry)

  • The unnamed protagonist of Ottessa Moshfegh’s My Year of Rest and Relaxation

Look for inspiration among the best of them! Don’t give up now - keep staying inside. It’s some of the most important work you can be doing.

Leave a heart! A joke! Or some extra brain cells. Whatever you have to spare.


Wellness Check

anybody out there?

I feel like so much has changed since I wrote to you on Sunday.

I have friends saying their coworkers are crying on Zoom, a friend going on a first date on FaceTime, friends frantically flying from all reaches of the earth to shelter with their families. My only plans for the coming weeks are a video-conference happy hour and a video conference game night! Never thought I’d hear OR say those words. I don’t really “play games” (I’m too shy for those sorts of things) but desperate times call for desperate measures, as I’ve been told.

I want to thank and say hey to everyone who’s receiving this as their first edition - signing up after I had posted that for every new subscriber I would donate $3 to the LA Regional Food Bank. Together we gave $75! And I’ll keep this going throughout the coming weeks - so if you enjoy this newsletter, please pass it on! Spread the word! I feel lucky to be salaried at this time and I’m happy to help where I can. Also, feel free to respond in an email or in the comments with any community mutual aid efforts that you’ve seen floating around. And if it’s of interest I can compile and send out a list! We’re stronger together.

I feel like I’m either losing it or the most sane I’ve ever been. These sorts of dire times really teach you a lot about yourselves, your communities, the loony toons in our government…

I’ve stocked up, I’ve read about what I need to do now, and what to do if Jack or I becomes sick, and that’s really all we can do, I think. Stay in, check on one another, and send resources & aid where we can.

Jack and I have been alternating “movie night picks.” So far we’ve watched Bridget Jones’ Diary, Frances Ha, Brick, and The Getaway sprinkled with a few episodes of Schitt’s Creek, because Dan Levy. Riverdale is also an INCREDIBLE quarantine show. It’s insane and will give you plenty to talk about with whoever you’re cooped up with. And if you’re alone, I also highly recommend the “Dial M for Maple” podcast on AV Club.

None of my self-soothing online purchases really worked out, so, that was a bit of a bummer. But now I’m eyeing all my favorite sites like a hawk for those HOPEFULLY coming deals. #Dark but…

Anyway. Keep taking your supplements, moving, loving, and taking care of yourselves.

I’ll check in again soon! I also got an email about setting up a group chat for subscribers so … thoughts? I’d love for y’all to meet.


PS - Two days until Animal Crossing!

An Update Regarding COVID-19

jk, it's not one of those

hi friends!

hope you’re all staying comfy, safe, and INDOORS. if you’re out and about and reading this on your phone…. get back in the house!! for the sake of yourself and your grandparents! and for other people’s grandparents that you’ll never even meet! and for people who aren’t even grandparents but are immunocompromised and need your cooperation and are SICK of your lil antics!

we’re all here together. and captive audiences crave content so… I hope this finds you well! how are you coping? I have a whole stack of books waiting to be read but all I can manage to do is tab between Instagram and Twitter. my brain is truly short-circuiting. I feel like there’s way too much going on, but like, there’s also absolutely nothing happening. i’ve been in this apartment, save 2 trips to the store and a walk, since thursday. it’s that weird contradiction of feeling like the world is ending while I’m sitting inside with my hair mask on, eating some apples and almond butter, wrapped under a cashmere blanket. all things considered… I’m chillin. but still freaking - but only because I know it’s going to get worse and I’m not sure what to do but to wait it out.

but, so, while we’re here, some things i’ll be doing / have done:


  • writing and reading all your writing! send me your favorite things. the blogaissance is upon us

  • using up all my beauty samples. i’m planning to leave this quarantine hotter than I found it!

  • so far I’ve purchased not one but TWO bernie sanders shirts online

  • made this homemade funfetti cake!

  • taking so, so many baths (soothing and clean!!)

  • waiting for the rain to clear so I can take my matcha outside and look at the sky

  • finishing knitting this cardigan that ive been working on for a YEAR. my goal was to finish and take it to Japan last spring lol. I have the back, the front, and one sleeve done!

write back - I love to hear from you! let’s be penpals in the time of the ‘rona.


Justin & Hailey 4Ever: On Streaming Changes as a Newlywed


the vibe for the last week has been extremely …. teen. I cant explain it. all roads lead to an absolute regression (or is it a profound return?) to adolescence.

and it would be funny, or weird, or whatever, if it weren’t for the fact that Justin Bieber is BACK and that he’s now unfortunately extremely relevant to me in several ways.

as i’m sure most of you are aware, Changes is here. before i could listen once, i think i got three separate texts from emily asking if i’d listened yet. so i’ll paint a picture for you - cruising down the baja coast, turkey sandwich in hand, listening on Apple Music with the lyrics feature ON for quick memorization, sharing earbuds with jack (he pulled them out like halfway through the album). marital bliss feels a lot like being 16!

the album, on its own, is fine lol. it’s like … funny. classicly Bieber. it’s peak earnest. i wouldn’t say i’ve ever been a belieber but it’s impossible to not love him. and it’s even more impossible not to love him and hailey. i’m totally obsessed with them as a couple, and it’s easy to see why he loves her so much.

I mostly love how protective Hailey is of Justin, and when Jack came down with the flu last weekend, it was really all I could think about!! i’ve never felt more “Justin and Hailey” than feeding Jack his first lypo-spheric vitamin C packet and running to source 5 different kinds of soup. while jack was sick, we watched Seasons, the companion docu-series to Changes, which, if you haven’t seen is a must. the doc has great Hailey content, heavily features their hyperbaric oxygen chamber and their like 8 random pets, and gives a truly essential perspective on the album. the last episode of Seasons airs tonight, and i’m looking forward to more relaxing programming than last night’s debate. (noteworthy: hailey is a bernie supporter!)

while we’ve been savoring the series, i’ve been playing Changes on … repeat. I love the vocal expression, the vibe, all of the love behind it. I just drive around listening to it over and over, picturing Hailey listening to it too while doing leg lifts or the stairmaster and just smiling to herself being like “Yeah babe!” and it makes me smile too. it brings me closer to their love! which, as a fan, is huge.

Image result for hailey bieber seasons wifey

(I still want to watch the Zane Lowe interview with Justin. It’s like 45 minutes long. Incredible.)

Other things that have made me feel teen (synonyms being young, COOL, full of life, etc)

  • getting my second lobe piercing at Meijuri on Melrose!

  • … and immediately followed it with a peek in Glossier. Thinking about getting this seafoam eyeliner. Does anyone have a promo code they want to share before I buy? Lemme get you those REWARDS!

  • sorry to be so materialistic but I also .. got … these from the Sandy Liang x Vans collection.

  • In Jack’s illness we also watched CHEER. Would love to discuss, so give me a shout back with your favs.

  • I started reading Drive Your Plow Over the Bones of the Dead for Junior High LA’s book club! I’m not sure I’ll be finished by the time of the meeting tonight and I’m enjoying this book too much for any spoilers, but I hope I can make it to a meeting soon!

  • Painted my nails HOT PINK since they’re finally getting long and strong again. good omen for spring.

  • And maybe the most teen thing was having Celia in town. My most teen friend and ilysm!!!

sending all love, all the time!

Babes Only!!

That's you!

Happy Valentine’s Day!!!

I hope your day is filled with sweets and treats and music and PASTA - the kind you can twirl.

Yesterday, Jack and I drove down to San Diego. In the car, with my mans, listening to the two, leading voices on contemporary love - Ciara and The 1975. Big chunes only! Swoon.

I’m feeling truly blessed this year and so full of love from friends, family, and random nooks of the universe.

I feel like I could really write, at length, about love but I unfortunately cannot right now! So I’ll just be thinking about it. Pining for it! Taking little notes in my head all the time.

Love you all for real for real.

Leave a heart! A Valentine!

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